Friday, December 14, 2007

RETRACTION

Any and all comments I have ever made in support of the pediatric dentist, Dr. Kurt A. Aarons whose office is located on Belleview in Kansas City, MO, are hereby retracted. I received a surprising letter from his office.

I would like to share part of this letter with you. I was shocked to read,"Due to differing treatment philosophies, we feel that you would be more comfortable in an office that shares your same views and beliefs. We have cancelled Cordelia's appointment on December 17, 2007." I received this letter after business hours on Thursday, December 13.

So, this is what I believe. I guess I'm not sure what beliefs Dr. Aarons' office holds if he feels I need to go somewhere else to find someone who shares my beliefs. I believe that all children should be treated with respect. I believe that patients, parents and the healthcare provider should work together to decide what course of treatment is in the best interest of the child. I believe that a parent is the final decision maker of what is best for the child. I believe that it is best to discuss differences of opinion with all parties and not act on one persons experience and that which is overheard by another. I believe that a parent can be the best asset a healthcare professional, including dentists, can have in a room to reassure the child that everything is OK.

I understand that there comes a time when children are ready and able to go into the back with the dental staff alone. I also understand that the dental office is probably good at dentistry. I have no expertise in this area, hence the reason my children see a dentist. What I want is a dentist's office that understands that I have expertise as well. My area of expertise is my children. I know what they are capable of more so than any dentist. I work with them prior to any and all visits to the doctor, dentist, and any other situation that is out of the norm so they understand what will happen. When I am caught in a situation where I am not able to prepare a child, I will be by that child every step of the way.

For those of you who don't know me very well, I have been through several dentist visits with several children. About age 5, all the kids were able to say they could do it themselves when asked. Cordelia is 3.

The letter makes it sound as if they are doing me a favor instead of firing us as patients. I would like it put on the record that I was not contacted by the dentist or anyone else in the office to discuss this decision. My understanding is that my conversation with the office manager was overheard by another staff member and the dentist discussed it with them only. I was told this morning that the office manager told the dentist both sides of the story. However, I have yet to comprehend how both sides of the story are presented when only one side is present.

Please feel free to forward this post in it's entirety if you feel it will help parents make choices and formulate questions for their dentist or other healthcare professional. We all need support from others that know this one simple truth. We are all experts in our own children.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

I think asking for parents to wait outside during a dentist's appointment is appalling. Oh, I'm not shocked that this is the office's policy. We went through several dentists until we found one that said, "yes! Of course you can come back." Even though, to be honest, in talking to my daughter before the procedures, one thing they said was "If you don't stay calm, honey, mommy will have to leave the room." I didn't speak up because we were right in the middle of it and my daughter would definitely have melted down (incidentally, she is 6 and not ready to go in alone, which I think is just fine). But I think that whole "parents as the enemy/parents as a distraction" thing is just bull. Some kids can do it. My kids can't. And that's fine.
When I lived in St. Loius, THE pediatric dentist wouldn't allow parents back in the room and he saw kids as young as two.
It's power-trippy for them, and just their way of ensuring they can bully scared kids. For shame!

Anonymous said...

Deanna, I fully support your decision. As a family physician, I never even ask to see a child alone until puberty, and even then it is the patient's choice. Children, by definition, cannot give or (important in this instance) withdraw consent. If you as the parent are not present, how can you tell when it is time to withdraw consent? As a woman, I don't receive health care myself without a friend and advocate present. As a mother, I do not leave my child alone for any kind of health care. This trend of dentists insisting on a policy of mothers staying in the waiting room is one I am hearing more and more about and I don't like it.

Elizabeth Allemann, MD

EP said...

Hey Deanna!

Sorry it's taken me a bit to get back to you. If you want to e-mail me, I'm at eprairie at yahoo

EP