Deanna's Thoughts

Looking back.

noreply@blogger.com (Deanna) — Fri, 10 Jul 2009 17:32:00 +0000

I just spent that last few minutes reading most of my blog posts from 2007. I was hunting for a particular post (never found exactly what I was looking for) and was caught up in all of my arguments for the passage of pro-midwifery legislation. I can't help but grin. I'm really proud to be able to say that typos aside, I stand by what I wrote and think it may be time to pull some of those past posts to the forefront.

So, if you have a few minutes and want to walk a while in the past, or if you are new to my blog, check out 2007.

What follows is a great post from Nov of 2007. What I realize is that I am practicing what I preach. I am back in school, working to complete a goal that I set for myself years ago. I am not neglecting my children because I am taking care of myself. In reality, I become a better, stronger, and more well rounded mother because I am also an individual.

Follow Your Passion (Nov 2, 2007)
The weekend is here and we are busy as ever. Odin and Byron are camping with Cub Scouts tomorrow through Sunday, and I leave tomorrow for the LLL of Mo Conference. I am presenting a session on Following your Passion while Raising Your Family. Here's what I am am hoping the attendees will understand when they leave:

I want to be my children's Mom, but I don't want to JUST be their Mom. I want to be ME! That includes being the best Mom I can be, while modeling that I am important too! My passions are a worthwhile endeavor that make me a better person. In turn, following my passions makes me a better Mom!

I will do my best to prioritize my life to include taking time for my passions. I won't need to neglect my children as I will find a way to make sure their needs are met. I will utilize the support of others to meet this goal and I will do my best to support them in turn.

Money is changing hands

noreply@blogger.com (Deanna) — Wed, 08 Jul 2009 17:00:00 +0000

Cordelia got in trouble today. Big trouble. It seems as if she thinks it's OK to throw things and break things when she's mad. She got set in the corner, and proceeded to call me all the names she hears the older kids say. I then put her in her room and told her I would talk to her once she had picked up her room and put away her laundry. When I walked away, she was screaming like someone was killing her.

A little while later, I notice the quiet. A little while after that, I see her come up with Kalina. Cordelia tells me she did her jobs and apologized. During lunch, Acacia tells me the reason Cordelia quieted down and did her work was because KALINA PAID HER OFF! Kalina was sick of the screaming and gave Cordelia $1 to stop crying and pick up.

One dollar isn't much money, but it's the principle of the matter. I made Cordelia give back the money and told Kalina she could pay Cordelia to do extra work, but not the basic jobs that I make them do.

I do think Kalina needs to find a good paying job if this is the way she's going to get her kids to quiet down during a temper tantrum!

Done!

noreply@blogger.com (Deanna) — Wed, 08 Jul 2009 16:55:00 +0000

I did it! I finished my first semester back at school. Three classes down and what seems like a gillion to go. I think I got straight As, but won't be sure until the grades are posted for the final class.

Deb's Tapenade Recipe from Allrecipes.com

noreply@blogger.com (Deanna) — Thu, 02 Jul 2009 00:29:00 +0000

Check out this recipe I found on Allrecipes.com!

So yummy! I've been wanting to try tapenade for a while. The kids have been talking about it because of iCarly. Three out of five kids liked it, with Kalina not being able to stop eating it! I didn't have Balsamic vinegar, so I substituted lemon juice.

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It's my turn

noreply@blogger.com (Deanna) — Thu, 30 Apr 2009 18:25:00 +0000

Many of you know that I have not finished my degree. I started right out of high school, but then got married and the babies kept coming. I tried going back about 6 years ago, but new babies and older children and the house and Odin's job and all my volunteer work... It just didn't work out.

I am getting ready to try again. This time around, I'll be planning on needing time away from the kids for class and study. For the first time ever, I will be paying a full time sitter to watch Valen during the school year. I'm very happy with the choice we made in sitters and he can't wait!

I'll be going for a teaching degree in Family and Consumer Science (FACS). For those of you who don't know what this is, think home ec. I get to start on May 11 with a sewing class. I'm very excited because it is 4 days a week, four hours a day, for three weeks. Can you just see how happy I'll be getting to sew without little people interupting every five minutes?!

I'm still waiting for my official acceptance to UCM and to see how many hours they will transfer. I'm hoping that most of my gen eds will transfer and that I don't have to retake much.

Homework time at our house will probably look a little different for the next few years. Instead of me making supper while I help with homework, I'll be sitting at the table with them doing mine while they do theirs!

Just talk, I'm right here!

noreply@blogger.com (Deanna) — Thu, 09 Apr 2009 01:19:00 +0000

There is a new phenomenon in my home. My loving husband has a new appendage. It goes with him everywhere and takes several forms. I've seen him with it during the day, but now it is ALWAYS there. What could it possibly be? One of the children? Facial hair? Return of the Jedi shoes? Not even close - it is his laptop/blackberry/phone.

He found this application called Meebo. He is now always logged in to all his IM sites and they go to one place. He has it linked up to his UCM webpage and I think he's always on it. Between this and Facebook, I'm a distant third when it comes to evening conversation once the kids go to bed! I know this will slow down and his students need him too, but I think I'm figuring out an alternative.

This week, I am having trouble with speaking and have been using IM and email more than usual. I've taken advantage of him having an electronic appendage since I couldn't have a good phone conversation while he was at work. However, later one evening, he happened to be sitting on the couch working with his laptop and I had mine and was chatting with friends on Facebook and IM. Just for fun, I wrote to him. I wrote again. He's grinning and also a little annoyed. So, of course, I do it again and again and again. I was having a good time.

Keep in mind we are RIGHT NEXT TO EACH OTHER! My excuse is that I can't speak well and am just picking at him. He can talk just fine. I about fell over when he writes back that he is going to go to bed soon. HE'S RIGHT THERE! Why couldn't he just say it? I truly believe he didn't even realize the humor until I fell off the couch laughing!

April Fools

noreply@blogger.com (Deanna) — Tue, 07 Apr 2009 20:04:00 +0000

I love April Fool's Day. Time for playing all the jokes you wanted to all year long, but didn't dare. We have the added benefit of our children loving this day as well. There have been years where pranks are planned months in advance.

This year was somewhat uneventful. We got a few people, but nothing significant. I had someone (to be left nameless to protect her identity) at Odin's office tell him the NCATE reviewers had a problem with his program, but he didn't fall for it. I got him later by telling him 2 of our kids were getting suspended for fighting at two different schools and he needed to go get them.

The best joke of all was on a homeschooling friend of mine and a teacher friend. I told them both that a one-liner was stuck into a bill and it had passed both the house and senate. This one line said that to homeschool in MO you had to have a teaching certificate. Both friends flipped and were upset. Quite an interesting reaction, huh? The reasons behind the reactions would be a whole other post.

FYI - here are our simple rules for pranks:
1. you can't hurt anyone or anything
2. you can only play a prank on someone who can take the joke
3. minimum amount of time between the joke and letting the person off the hook

Pretty simple, but so much fun!

Kalina switched all the cereals to different boxes, Cordelia put fake food in the kids' lunches, and somehow, I got Byron to hold a cup of water to the ceiling with the broom handle. Lots of little things, but we'll have to plan big for next year.

What do you do?

noreply@blogger.com (Deanna) — Thu, 02 Apr 2009 21:52:00 +0000

I have been asked many times what I do. I've answered jokingly that I am a breeder as I have had several children. I know that in today's world it is typical for both parents to work and the children go to day care. I understand that living on one income has us making financial choices about what is and is not important to us. I like the way we live and cannot imagine working full time and still being able to do the things during the day and night that my children need and want me to do. Our life choices have made it possible for us to have everything we need and most everything we truly want.

For example, I wanted a front load washing machine. It took me years to save for it, but we gave it to ourselves for our 10th anniversary a few years ago. When we hooked up the machine, the kids laid on the floor and watched the clothes go round and round. It was something special and we didn't take it for granted. I still think about how grateful I am that we have it every time I wash a load of clothes.

Lately, I have been asked if we have several children because Odin made me. I've also been asked if Odin makes me stay home. Is he ok with women working outside the home? Why don't I finish school and get a job? Unfortunately, those who read this probably don't have these same questions, but let me set a few things straight.

Odin and I chose to have a large family. We always joked about having 6 children. We just never thought we would actually have 6 until we did. I wouldn't trade a single one of them even on our worst days. Odin does not make me stay home. In fact, I think he would love for me to go back to work as soon as possible. The problem is that I do so much with the house and kids during the day. I just don't know who would pick up the slack! Who's job would be more important if there are sick kids, problems at school, etc? I don't want to finish school right now because of time and money. Why spend money on a degree that I am not planning on using anytime soon? Why not wait and see what types of jobs are available and interesting and train for those instead?

So, does Odin think women shouldn't work? NO. I really don't think he cares what your gender is as long as you get the job done. Until recently, he has always seemed to land jobs where he is one of the few male employees. When we lived in Rockford, he was the ONLY male employee.

That's what Odin thinks. Here's what I think. Men and women are different. If you can prove me wrong, please do so. Women have babies. Men can't. Women are designed biologically to provide not only comfort and care, but 100% of the nourishment a baby needs for at least the first 6 months of life. My job was and is to care for the children I brought into the world. I still have two at home all day with me. I still have older children who need me when they get off the bus. Who, but me, will give them the love, attention, and guidance that only I can give? Should I pay someone else to raise my children when I can do it better? I not only love my children, but I really like them, too. I want to be home with them. I want to volunteer in the community and at church while not do it by taking away the few hours I have with my kids after school.

I am a bit defensive, but I'm shocked that there are people who look down on the choice we made almost 14 years ago for me to raise the children while Odin works outside of the home. If you truly want to know what I do, keep my schedule for a few days. Follow me around if you think you can keep up. Take note of all I do. I'd keep track of it all myself, but I'm too busy with more important things like raising my children.

NCATE is a thorn in my side

noreply@blogger.com (Deanna) — Sat, 28 Mar 2009 19:35:00 +0000

and I'm not even doing all the work. Odin's been working like a madman for weeks and weeks. The review teams are here and the stress is on. I love how I've been told he can be called in at anytime of the day or night until they leave. On top of everything else, the day after the teams leave, he gets to head off to Jeffferson City. Not to sound unsupportive, but, WHEN WILL I GET MY BREAK!?

The good news? The next NCATE visit is seven years away!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Kalina's Winterguard photos

noreply@blogger.com (Deanna) — Sat, 28 Mar 2009 17:27:00 +0000

Here are a couple of links to pictures of Kalina performing. She looks so pretty and grown up!

Kalina at Blue Springs Feb 14, 2009

Kalina at Smithville March 21, 2009 #1

Kalina at Smithville March 21, 2009 #2

Warrensburg JV at Smithville

Warrensburg JV at Blue Springs

She's in Springfield today for the Guard Championship today. I hope the weather holds and they get home safely!

It's no big deal

noreply@blogger.com (Deanna) — Wed, 25 Mar 2009 16:10:00 +0000

I don't know how to convince my children that they are accomplishing great things. Kalina made the JV Winterguard team this year, is on the honor roll, won an essay contest about what the US Flag means to her and was inducted to the National Jr. Honor Society. When we tell her how proud we are of her, she responds with a look that could knock over a scarecrow. "It's no big deal, everybody does it." Really?! Everybody does it, or are we just lucky that her circle of friends are high achievers as well? I like to think the later!

The kids have grown, but...

noreply@blogger.com (Deanna) — Tue, 24 Mar 2009 23:21:00 +0000

Here's the latest picture that I have on my computer of the family. Odin keeps them all on the desktop, and I just haven't had the time or motivation to put them on my computer. They've grown a bit since then, but it's really only been a few months!

It's been a LONG TIME

noreply@blogger.com (Deanna) — Tue, 24 Mar 2009 23:14:00 +0000

Wow, it's been over a year since I posted. Lots has happened and I'm not sure where to start. I'll have to try and find time to write more as I really miss it.

The latest? We found the house of my dreams this past week. Unfortunately it was being sold at an estate auction. I found the house Wednesday, researched the auction, got the financing and took Odin to look at the house and decided we wanted it by 3:00 Thursday. Saturday rolled around and we were outbid. I was in a foul mood all Saturday afternoon. The interesting thing is that Odin got a call Monday morning from another university to let him know they would be checking his references. The timing is scary!

The DROID

noreply@blogger.com (Deanna) — Thu, 14 Feb 2008 04:09:00 +0000

I'm going to bed now. The droid (the family's name for the scooba) can stay up and clean my kitchen floor for me! Gosh, I am such a good housewife and so good at multi-tasking that I can wash the floor and sleep all at the same time.
Goodnight.

Happy Valentine's Day

noreply@blogger.com (Deanna) — Wed, 13 Feb 2008 17:55:00 +0000

We have finally convinced Odin that Valentine's Day does not equal candy! It should be a good day here tomorrow - No school and a 5 day weekend! Unfortunately, 4 out of the five kids are home sick today. We'll see if Acacia ends up sick in the next couple of days. I'm getting better at dealing with multiple sick children. The work never ends while they are awake, but at least they will rest here and there and veg out in front of the TV.

This year, I researched and bought a new toy that I am totally in LOVE with. Odin is relieved to know that this is what he is giving me for Valentine's Day. I have a Scooba to clean my floors for me!!!! The white kitchen floor is actually white, clean, and even shiny!!! I'll have the girls turn it on in the basement bathroom later today and then ALL the hard surface floors in the house will be clean!!! Best part - I don't have to supervise this machine - I can even leave the house while it is on!!!!! Odin's happy that I am not one of those women who hates getting appliances as gifts!

I finally found Rocketman at Amazon for Odin. It is such a hilariously silly movie that the family enjoys. "It wasn't me!" Odin and I watched it last night as the next few nights have us out and about and are our family TV nights.

We are braving mess and I found Moon Sand for the kids. They really like the small set we got for Valen and Cordelia and I thought it would be neat to get enough for them all at once. Gee whiz, it sure takes alot to get all five of them able to play at the same time. I ended up getting 2 of the big buckets and a couple more play sets. For us, it works better than play dough because it doesn't dry out.

Busy weekend, but at least the kids are fever sick and not puking sick!

Getting older, but still having fun!

noreply@blogger.com (Deanna) — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 18:56:00 +0000

Check out Odin playing around on a Sunday morning. No special effects, this is how the light saber shows up on camera.

Odin as a Jedi Video on MySpace

Time for change

noreply@blogger.com (Deanna) — Tue, 22 Jan 2008 15:57:00 +0000

Notice anything different? I had my hair cut yesterday, and just for fun, had it temporarily straightened. IT TOOK AN HOUR! I get to keep it this way until I wash it later in the week. She did show me how to do it, but who has an hour to work on their hair?

Valen didn't like it too much and stayed away from me for a few hours. He wouldn't even take a cup from me. The other kids think it looks weird. Odin and I kinda like it, but the curls are so much easier.

I wonder if I went to the capital with straight hair one day and curly the next, if they would think I was two different people voicing my support for midwifery. It'd be fun to try!

Not quite two -

noreply@blogger.com (Deanna) — Tue, 15 Jan 2008 02:19:00 +0000

On Wednesday, Valen will be two years old. It seems to me that this child, the youngest of the six has come into his "twoness" quite early. The words and signs have been there for a while. He is able to get into the treehouse, able to get up on the trampoline, gets onto the counter to get into the upper cabinets and last but not least he knows how to get on the computer.

This last one is the reason I have been so quiet lately. Around December 20, Valen climbed up and opened my closed laptop and proceeded to rip 21 keys off the keyboard, and chew on a few before I realized what he was doing. To make it a little funnier - I WAS IN THE KITCHEN - 10 feet away, with no walls between us. Needless to say, he did this in record time. I have been without my laptop in the dining room since then. It came home fixed and with a big price tag on Friday.

Odin has up a group shot of the kids at Christmas, and as soon as I catch up and get the photos downloaded, I'll get more up!

RETRACTION

noreply@blogger.com (Deanna) — Fri, 14 Dec 2007 15:43:00 +0000

Any and all comments I have ever made in support of the pediatric dentist, Dr. Kurt A. Aarons whose office is located on Belleview in Kansas City, MO, are hereby retracted. I received a surprising letter from his office.

I would like to share part of this letter with you. I was shocked to read,"Due to differing treatment philosophies, we feel that you would be more comfortable in an office that shares your same views and beliefs. We have cancelled Cordelia's appointment on December 17, 2007." I received this letter after business hours on Thursday, December 13.

So, this is what I believe. I guess I'm not sure what beliefs Dr. Aarons' office holds if he feels I need to go somewhere else to find someone who shares my beliefs. I believe that all children should be treated with respect. I believe that patients, parents and the healthcare provider should work together to decide what course of treatment is in the best interest of the child. I believe that a parent is the final decision maker of what is best for the child. I believe that it is best to discuss differences of opinion with all parties and not act on one persons experience and that which is overheard by another. I believe that a parent can be the best asset a healthcare professional, including dentists, can have in a room to reassure the child that everything is OK.

I understand that there comes a time when children are ready and able to go into the back with the dental staff alone. I also understand that the dental office is probably good at dentistry. I have no expertise in this area, hence the reason my children see a dentist. What I want is a dentist's office that understands that I have expertise as well. My area of expertise is my children. I know what they are capable of more so than any dentist. I work with them prior to any and all visits to the doctor, dentist, and any other situation that is out of the norm so they understand what will happen. When I am caught in a situation where I am not able to prepare a child, I will be by that child every step of the way.

For those of you who don't know me very well, I have been through several dentist visits with several children. About age 5, all the kids were able to say they could do it themselves when asked. Cordelia is 3.

The letter makes it sound as if they are doing me a favor instead of firing us as patients. I would like it put on the record that I was not contacted by the dentist or anyone else in the office to discuss this decision. My understanding is that my conversation with the office manager was overheard by another staff member and the dentist discussed it with them only. I was told this morning that the office manager told the dentist both sides of the story. However, I have yet to comprehend how both sides of the story are presented when only one side is present.

Please feel free to forward this post in it's entirety if you feel it will help parents make choices and formulate questions for their dentist or other healthcare professional. We all need support from others that know this one simple truth. We are all experts in our own children.

It's beginning to look alot like Christmas...

noreply@blogger.com (Deanna) — Wed, 12 Dec 2007 12:51:00 +0000

so why is life so crazy? Shouldn't the "look" of Christmas follow the feel of Christmas? From programs to parties, it just seems like one thing after another. I am missing the days when I had no children in school and we baked every day between Thanksgiving and Christmas. We had quite the variety and quantity of treats. I would freeze them and we would have cookies until Easter.
Times change and so do traditions. We are now speeding through life at such a frenzied pace that the baking is going to be done right before Christmas. I am also trying to keep hold my "to do" list and know that it doesn't all have to be done. I don't have to keep the house really clean, I do have to keep it clean enough so we don't get sick. The house doesn't have to be decorated perfectly, but the decorations need to have meaning.
I have found new meaning in my Christmas tree star this year. Our star is on it's last leg, but I think I am going to take some time this next year to try and fix it instead of getting a new one. This star is one of the first Christmas tree decorations Odin and I bought at a sale after our first Christmas together. This year, it is looking sad and crooked. No matter how many times we get up there and straighten it, it looks like it is going to fall off the tree any moment. I have given up on the idea of having a perfect star on my tree. Come to think of it, this star is representative of how I should live my life. I am far from perfect, and many times I am looking sad, frazzled, and in all honesty, probably a little crooked as well. I do my job and I do it well, just as that star is up there reminding us of Jesus' birth. After all, what is in our hearts, and how we express that in our daily life through words and actions, not what we look like doing it that is important.
Reading over this, I realize that the words sound a little awkward, but that's ok! Maybe I won't fix the star this year. Maybe the new tradition will be a crooked star.

Snow Day

noreply@blogger.com (Deanna) — Tue, 11 Dec 2007 19:43:00 +0000

It's that time of year again as the winter weather is upon us. It is wet and rainy and we are bracing for ice. Church was cancelled Sunday, we had school yesterday, and we are closed today. The weather isn't behaving as predicted and the temperatures have held. The roads are wet, but not very slick at this point. The latest is that the temps will drop tonite and we'll have ice all over the place.

I'm not complaining, though. We had a whole day to play! Odin was able to get to work safely, all homework was done last night, and we haven't had to rush around at all. Half the kids are still in their pjs!

I could handle a few more days like this!

"Little kids are so gullible"

noreply@blogger.com (Deanna) — Sun, 09 Dec 2007 00:49:00 +0000

The older kids have figured out that Valen will believe everything they say. When they want him to leave them alone, they will use almost any story to get him to run to the other side of the house. For quite some time they have used, "Go see if Daddy's home," and "Want a bath?" Those have been quite easy to figure out as Daddy and bath are two distinguishable words in his ever increasing vocabulary.

The latest and greatest way they are getting Valen to leave them alone is to tell this sweet little almost two year old boy that I have candy for him. The poor child is constantly coming up to me saying, "canny? mooore?" When I tell him he can't have any, he'll stop his foot and say, "neet now, momma!" Like I'm going to give into that one.

Why baby-proofing your house is not enough!

noreply@blogger.com (Deanna) — Tue, 27 Nov 2007 20:07:00 +0000

I have locks on certain cabinets, the medicines are out of reach, small things are kept out of little hands and mouths. You would think this would be enough.

THINK AGAIN - I have two words for all of you: CHRISTMAS SNOOP

I was the queen of snooping at Christmastime. My kids are getting there earlier than I was and they are blaming the little ones. "I didn't open the door, Valen and Cordelia did it." When I ask who told them to do so, and who helped, I get the truth. "I did." Hey, at least they're honest!

So now is the season for snoop-proofing on top of the baby proofing!

Magic Driveway

noreply@blogger.com (Deanna) — Tue, 20 Nov 2007 12:31:00 +0000

I'm not kidding! We really have a magic driveway.

We were in the process of cleaning out and getting rid of stuff as we thought we were heading out of state. What we have found out in the process is that almost anything, not wrapped in a trash bag, will disappear from the end of our driveway very quickly.

We didn't actually see the stuff disappear, but what else could it be when the stuff is gone within an hour or so?

We had 2 beat up dressers, a queen size mattress and boxspring, a framed print that was stained and the glass cracked, an extremely old treadmill, as well as various toys find a new home via the magic driveway. What is so funny is that the neighbors' driveways aren't as magical. At least one has asked if they can use mine to see if their stuff would magically disappear instead of ending up in the garbage truck!

I finally have an adult bedroom!!!

noreply@blogger.com (Deanna) — Mon, 19 Nov 2007 23:07:00 +0000

Ok, so that title may sound odd, considering I've been married for 12 years, but it's true!

My consolation prize for the roller coaster ride of stay/go around here was getting a new bedroom set. I just put my clothes and things away and it all fits in half of the dresser and in half of the drawers under the bed. I still have an empty chest of drawers!!!! Does this mean I have to convince Odin I need to go shopping?